Spoiled Yogi

Tummy Time – Pay no attention to those watermarks!

It’s as if she thinks that trying harder will somehow get her to where she’s trying to go faster, but in reality the harder she tries the more upset she gets and the less likely she is to make much progress…. sound familiar?

This is how most of us are when we unroll our mats. Though we might not outwardly erupt into a temper tantrum, we all have moments when we’re impatient with ourselves to the point of frustration. I will admit to having an inner tantrum on more than one occasion when I couldn’t achieve an asana when I thought I should. Who among us hasn’t put that strap around our feet in an attempt to forward ford and pulled it just a little bit too vigorously thinking it might help get our foreheads to our shins? And, seriously, how many times do I have to practice it before I actually start to like that damn Revolved Triangle Pose?

Anyway, watching my wee one struggle in this way makes me wonder if striving is a learned behavior or something we’re born with. I suppose it’s possible that she just got the impatient, try-too-hard gene (like mother, like daughter?), but my guess is that we’re all struggling with it on some level–even though we all know it really doesn’t help us achieve our goals any faster.

So help me out here. Which poses do you find yourself trying way too hard in? Do you think you were born trying too hard? Or is it something you’ve learned by growing up in this culture where everyone tells you to work longer, harder hours?

My cat is the most annoying creature to ever walk the planet.

She has soft, fluffy white fur, stunning blue eyes, and the most adorable pink nose you’ve ever seen–which is lucky for her because if she weren’t so cute I’m not sure I would have tolerated her all these years. Don’t judge me! She stands on my pillow in the middle of the night and screams directly in my ear. When that doesn’t wake me up she knocks things off my night stand–sometimes my lamp falls over and hits me in the head. Oh, and she also refuses to poo in the litter box.

She is so persistent we almost always give in to her. It’s just easier to wake up and pet her in the middle of the night than to sweep up the shards of glass the next morning. A few hours ago, I had finally gotten the baby to sleep. I was holding her in the recliner about to drift off myself when the cat came prancing over and jumped into my lap. This, of course, is where the baby was sleeping. So I picked the cat up with my free hand and put her in the floor. She jumped back up… maybe 10 times until I just scooted over and made room. She purred and fell asleep.

I wanted to ring her neck, but I also kind of admire how she is so unphased by rejection. She just keeps going for what she wants, and she doesn’t give a shit what anyone else thinks. Cats are like that–and I want learn to be more like that, too. All too often I let rejection or criticism (or the fear of rejection or criticism) stop me from going for what I want in life.

Yoga has been great training. I’ve been try-try-trying for a decade to square my hips in Warrior I. I fell on my face a million times before I finally balanced in Bakasana. I might not ever be able to balance in Handstand in the middle of the room–not because I’m too weak, but because I’m too scared. But I know I have to keep trying, not to achieve the pose, but to overcome the fear.